Hello this is Chakra Girl reporting live from The Multimedia District. It’s May 30, Purple Chakra Saturday and this is your Third Eye witness news. We sense it first, invest in it, flip it, and you hear about it afterwards.

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Welcome back to the Multimedia District.

Our top story from the sixth sense newswire comes from Mount Sinai Hospital, where old women with hairy upper lips who call themselves – quote – nurses, have started charging royalty fees on each word that comes out of their mouths when a new patient arrives in the ER.

“It’s the pharmaceutical industry’s latest subliminal marketing campaign, while helping nurses boost their income,” said a Scripps PR executive who goes by the single name “Tandey,” a more harmonious name for her birth path, according to Kabalarians.com.

“it’s a win-win for everyone,” she added.

One patient, who visited the ER for a standard stitching, wasnt so convinced about the win-win arrangement when he received a bill for $1,000.

“I didn’t even see a doctor,” said the patient, who got tired of waiting after three hours and left the ER without getting the stitches.

The Chakra Girlz investigative reporting team traced the bill back to the pharmaceutical companies, which are using crowdsourcing techniques to offset the costs of the Nurse Ratched style subliminal advertising.

“If you ask me, this isn’t a win-win situation at all,” said the patient, whose open wound healed on its own within a week’s T-I-M-E. “It’s like receiving a bill from the cable company after watching a commercial. It’s absurd!”

Officials at Mount Sinai were not available for comment as they were busy playing golf at nearby La Gorce Country Club.

In Cleantech news, the states of Massachusetts and California have both invested millions of dollars into cleantech infrastructure, while the Sunshine State of Florida continues to generate power from the bouncing breasts of ViP cocktail waitresses at Miami Beach’s famous Shore Club Hotel. Environmentalists appeared at the Miami-Dade Commission meeting to debate the Eco-friendliness of silicone, and asked that only natural C cups or larger be employed for purposes of generating cleaner, more responsible energy for the county’s bedroom communities. Mayor Carlos Alvarez refrained from making a decision, stating that he would have to test the methods himself at a later date.

In Feminist news, models who weigh more than 120 pounds are now required by the Greater American Modeling Association to disclose their “Plus-size” status when meeting new people at social events, parties, family gatherings and any other public venue, to ensure that no one is confused or offended by their appetites for greasy pizza with extra meat toppings.

In Spoken Word news, the Miami Writers Association is hosting a comedy night at The Standard Hotel Thursday, June 11 starting at 8pm in the lounge next to the bar – yes, you can drink alcohol even at Miami Beach’s most spiritually conscious hotel!!

Bring friends, family and your funniest writing and we promise we will LOL (that’s Laugh Out Loud for the text-impaired).

This is Chakra Girl reporting for The Multimedia District.

Remember that ignorance is expensive and keep matches and flashlights stocked up for hurricane season.

Amen. Namaste. Ciao.